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Psychology Post-traumatic Stress Disorder (ptsd)

- From Sorrow to Strength

:a Father's Story of Loss

edited by Jude Avery

editor-in-chief Francis Mitchell

guest editor Virginia Houston

Publisher
New World Publishing
Initial publish date
Jul 2024
Category
Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD), Death, Grief, Bereavement
  • Paperback / softback

    ISBN
    9781989564332
    Publish Date
    Jul 2024
    List Price
    $17.95

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Description

Publisher’s Foreword

The author not only wished to convey the darkness that overcame him after his only son was tragically killed ... and explain his journey through what began as a dark abyss, but with time and support, eventually allowed him to return to some sense of normality, which he managed with the support of family, friends (both old and new) and an expecially supportive community where the family, including Justin, were well-known. However, Jude was also concerned that his son would not be forgotten. This story achieves both purposes. After the tragic night of New Years 2004 followed by a frantic drive to the Halifax Infirmary Brain Truama Unit where Justin had been airlifted. Sadly, he did not recover. The story continues with helpful memorial services and is followed by a full narrative of a son born a full decade after his two older sisters with vivid descriptions that illustrate a promising, indeed gifted life, cut far too short. The author also comments that it is only when one focuses on others in helpful ways apposed to only lamenting about oneself can one recover from such trauma. He describes that recovery in some detail in the hope that it might support others going through a similar trial. Indeed he was fortunate to find the right kind of support at the right time. Jude also refers to writing as therapy - and posted some of his annual poems about Justin in this publication, which is the third feature book he has written and published since 2018 ... this one is truly therapeutic.

About the authors

Contributor Notes

About the author

Jude Avery was born and raised in Larry’s River, Guysborough County, the youngest of five children born to Frank and Evangeline (Pellerin) Avery. He attended Larry’s River School until completion of Grade Nine, then transferred to Guysborough Municipal High School for Tenth Grade. He moved to Toronto in 1965 to live with his brother, Carman, and sister-in-law, Sara Ann while he attended Alderwood Collegiate Institute for Grade Eleven. He then enrolled at Radio College of Canada in Toronto in 1966 and completed a one-year program in Radio and Television Technology. Returning to Nova Scotia in 1967, Halifax became his new home where he worked in the technical field as a radio and television serviceman, then as a central office telephone equipment installer with Northern Electric.

While in Halifax he met his wife-to-be, Emma Vaughn (Vaughnie) MacNeil of Sydney Mines and made a drastic life shift when he registered at Saint Francis Xavier University as a mature student in September 1969, only days after marrying Vaughnie. He completed his Bachelor of Arts degree in 1972, Bachelor of Education in 1973 and Un Programme de Perfectionnement de Langue de l’Université Ste. Anne, in 1996.

His first employment upon completion of his St. Francis Xavier studies was as an Elementary Teacher at Pomquet Consolidated School. It was here that Jude began a lifetime process of discovery in the uniqueness and richness of Acadian history, culture and language. In his first year at Pomquet School, he was instrumental in organizing the first Carnaval d’Hiver in the community which was designed to celebrate the Acadian culture, history, and folklore. He was in Pomquet for two years and saw two of these events staged where excitement and pride were expressed by locals who were very ready to rediscover themselves and share their stories. This winter celebration has evolved to help shape Pomquet as a prominent Acadian region and the winter celebration continues to be held in February each year as a much-anticipated annual event.

He then transferred to the Guysborough School District as a junior high French teacher at the newly constructed Riverview Consolidated School in New Harbour in 1975. He spent his next fifteen years here until the Junior High section of the school was phased out due to a sharp enrollment decline in 1990.

Jude transferred to Canso High School as a high school French teacher and taught there for two years, then moved to Guysborough Municipal High School, again as a high school French teacher, where he remained until his retirement in 2003. During his entire teaching career, Jude was involved in Acadian affairs and served as regional representative and member of le Conseil d’Administration de la Fédération Acadienne de la Nouvelle Ecosse. This was a natural extension of his Acadian life and interest that evolved into a passion. Upon retirement, he was able to devote more time and effort educating himself in his culture, genealogy, and history. The first Congrès Mondial Acadien was held in the Moncton area of New Brunswick in 1994, while and subsequent events are held every five years in different Acadian/Cajun areas, proved to be real catalysts for him and many others to be drawn into this process of discovery.

Through Jude’s involvement with F.A.N.E., many doors were opened via meetings with am ever-widening range of people from many regions, which provided access to even more significant sources of information. Visits to Louisiana, France, and all Acadian regions of the Maritimes led to a growth in knowledge and a greater feeling for the Acadian saga.

After Justin’s death, Jude’s life changed dramatically with respect to his work with and on behalf of others. When Nova Scotia hosted the 2004 Congrès Mondial Acadien, Jude immediately became involved in the organization of the local Pellerin/Bonnevie/Retrouvailles/ family reunion celebrations. He had followed Brad Pellerin as President of the newly formed Société des Acadiens de la Région de Tor Baie after Brad’s death in 2002. This Association was established for the sole purpose of planning and steering the 2004 Pellerin/Bonnevie family reunion celebrations in the Tor Bay area. However, the celebrations proved to be so moving and exciting for the entire Tor Baie Acadien region, that an expressed desire to continue the process was initiated and the “Forgotten Acadians” of the Tor Bay shores were awakened and continued to make “cultural noise”. As a result of this Réveil/Awakening, several celebrated additions have been made within this forgotten Acadian region that have evolved into tourism gems for the area and province.

An annual Festival Savalette has been established and celebrated its 19th anniversary in 2023. Plans for a unique Parc de Nos Ancêtres were initially conceived and developed in 2006/2007 as ten professionally painted chapter scenes on rock were created by Moni Duersch and Charlotte Petitpas/Pitts. These were accompanied by bi-lingual interpretive panels as a means of presenting and interpreting uniquely, the Acadian history from the 1604 departure from France to settlement on the shores of Tor Baie in the late 1700s. This park was developed in the shape of an anchor, signifying the Acadian qualities of determination, attachment, perseverance, and adaptability. A “Salle Acadienne” Resource Centre was developed and built in 2011 where visitors and locals can discover and expand their knowledge of history, culture and genealogy. An 8 x 16 foot Moni Deursch historical mural (painting) is a featured part of this facility highlighting twenty-five local memorable scenes from the early 1900s to 1960.

In September 2018, Jude published his first historical non-fiction book entitled, The Forgotten Acadians, which sold out in 58 days. An updated and slightly expanded edition was printed in early 2019; it sold even more copies than the original and still sells well today. In 2020 he published a second book on Acadian culture: Joie de Vivre/Love of Life. Both titles were published by New World Publishing in English, but in 2023-24, that first publication was being translated into French ... New World is still looking for French-language publisher or co-publisher, to bring it to market.

The Lieutenant-Governor’s Awardwas s presented to the author for outstanding life-long work in support of Acadian Affairs & History

In March, 2021, Jude Avery was among the first of six initial recipients of the Lieutenant-Governor’s Award of Excellence for ‘lAcadie et La Francophonie of Nova Scotia, awarded for his life-long contribution to Acadian affairs and history. That contribution included writing stories about his region for over 30 years; teaching French for even longer in regional schools; personally helping out in coastal Louisiana (Baton Rouge) after Hurricane;s Katrina and Rita; working with others to bring Le Congrés Mondiale Acadien 2004 to the region. He was also the driving force behind the recognition of Place Savalette by the provincial

and federal governments, commemorating a lesser-known, but very important historic meeting between Captain Savalette and Samuel de Champlin in 1607 (at Port Felix, NS) before the latter founded what became the City of Quebec a year later - truly significant Canadian historical events. FANE and the Province of Nova Scotia then officially recognized the Tor Baie communities as the 12th Acadian region within the province.

Excerpt: - From Sorrow to Strength: :a Father's Story of Loss (edited by Jude Avery; editor-in-chief Francis Mitchell; guest editor Virginia Houston)

Prologue

Trauma is described as the body’s response to a deeply distressing or disturbing event or injury. It often overwhelms our ability to cope, creating feelings of helplessness diminishing our sense of self and our ability to express a full range of emotions and experiences. It can affect anyone, anywhere, at any time, and is often exacerbated by injury and prolonged stress.

Trauma is well known, and many people will or have experienced this at least once in their lifetime. Veterans of war who served in theatre often fell victim to it and their lives have been altered to the point where some

1. Acknowledgements of specific individuals are listed near the end of this book; see pp. 97)

From Sorrow to Strength Indesign.indd 4

2024-07-09

5:23 PM General Acknowledgements v may never completely overcome its impact (today commonly known as Post Traumatic Stress Disorder or PTSD). Others who survived serious accident injuries, prolonged debilitating illnesses or tragic loss may also experience deep-rooted mental and physical reactions altering their lives temporarily, or even permanently. Those effects are often determined by a variety of factors: the severity and duration of the event; the individual’s family support; their belief system; the level of community support; the abruptness of the event; their prior physical and emotional health, or simply age.

No one can really be certain if (s)he is prepared to deal with such stressful events and likely never anticipate having to deal with one. There is no rehearsal for it, and we never know when, or if it could strike. For some, it may present itself as a gradual, slowly developing phenomenon, while for others, it may be more of a lightning strike. One’s mental stability often can become acutely challenged during periods of trauma, while one’s inner strength and openness often determine the extent of its impact. Reactions differ with each person, meaning there is no clear road map as to how one will react or live through such an experience. For some, remaining private and internalizing their emotions may be their way forward, while for others, social supports and dialogue helps best. Just as reactions vary, so does the duration. Although there is usually an identifiable cause and presumptive beginning, there often is no predictable ending. The process and extent of healing also varies greatly among individuals as their struggles often impede their abilities to function normally, both physically and mentally.

In my case, I was unprepared for the suddenness and depth of this loss, placing me in an extremely vulnerable situation. From what sources could I obtain the necessary support, strength and meaning? Was such an oasis to be found in my desperation to satisfy my parched emotional needs? Answers were not quickly found, as pain and agony became commonplace in my life and for what seemed to be an eternity. As much as I tried rationalizing what happened, the puzzle could not be resolved; the picture would not come together with significant missing pieces. I was left with the task of searching for them among the heaps of my discarded past and an unexpected future. If only I had seen it coming, I could have been prepared - or so I thought!

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